There weren't even 10 mediocre moments! RT @pandora_radio: 10 best moments of the 2011 Video Music Awards @RollingStone: http://t.co/KWGbfJk

Had a dream that I got a new job and was so happy I cried. Damn you, subconscious. thanksforthat

Maybe I should start praying to Murphy. That guy and his law are pretty damn accurate.

True for me! RT @davepell: The insta-legacy: In next few mins, millions learn about Jobs' resignation via 1 of the devices he spearheaded.

"We had an earthquake? I didn't notice." - the entire state of California

In a perfect world, I would have @StacyLondonSays 's arms.

WHEW! RT @cnnbrk: The magnitude of the earthquake that struck Virginia and much of the East Coast has been downgraded from 5.9 to 5.8

FF RT @kellyoxford: Hef's runaway bride claims she "didn't notice the 60 year age difference" but really meant "I can't count that high"

Self sticking bubble wrap is genius! moving

Finally watched the WNTW premiere. @clinton_kelly LOVED your jacket at Becky's reveal! That color!

Ha! RT @allisuzanne: I decided that planning a wedding is much like pledging a sorority. The most fun that I'll never want to have again.

Not a good sign that my 1st thought every morning is "how can I avoid going to work on time this morning?" And by "on time" I mean "at all".

LOL! RT @MNSportsbitch: Kara, woman on House Hunters? Hope a shark eats the bitch.

An entire night of @HGTV, uninterrupted. lastdayslivingalone

DING DONG THE WITCH IS DEAD designstar

Thankfully, only 2 weeks left til I have a 24 hour gym 30 feet from my place! byelafitness noexcuses

Finally get burst of motivation, only to find gym closed at 8. LAME. Thanks LA Fitness. Am missing my 24 HR & LVAC in Vegas!

All three Backtothefuture movies back to back on VH1 Classic! lazysunday

How quickly could we get Iowa to secede? taketexaswithyou

LOVE 8x, O 5x, Mystere 4x, Ka 2x RT @unmarketing: Anyone seen the same @Cirque show multiple times? I've seen Ka 5x, O 3x, Mystere 3x

United too! RT @bazecraze: The only slogan Delta should legally be allowed to use is "Beats Walkin'!"

In addition to the cardigan I'm wearing, I now have on a fur-lined jacket. It's STUPID how cold my office is. hatemyjob

Heartbroken that there were Iines on my beloved @AmazonKindle screen, warranty almost up. Called to have it repaired. Immediately replaced!

I will be a lifetime @Amazon customer! Thank you @AmazonKindle team for being awesome & replacing my broken Kindle with a simple phone call!

Wetsuits = my own personal seventh level of hell.

Vacation lies I tell myself! RT @jennyandteets: "Yeah, but we did a lot of walking" code for: "Why did we mother fucking EAT THAT!?"

Even a rainstorm can't ruin this day though! I love you, @MyDeformedElbow ! http://ping.fm/P1aHY

Mini rainstorm in Kona. Waiting for the sun to break through so we can continue our day in the water! vacationtweets

I would like to make an official request from @scottscool7 to bring back the TOTD!